About me
I really hesitated to post this. Because it’s about me.
Again and again, I keep having to remind myself: it’s not about me. I get so frustrated with myself for my mind wandering into self-centered channels, and then it dawns on me that even my self-frustration is self frustration—I’m still making it about me.
The apostle Paul had it right. “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” (Galatians 2:20) It’s not about me—I’m dead. It’s about Christ who is now living in me.
But it appears Paul had the same problem I do. Galatians was his first letter, at least the first preserved for us, written shortly after his first journey. Years later, nearing the end of his third journey, he writes this: “So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited. Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.” (2 Corinthians 12:7-9)
He had a problem, a temptation to be me-focused. He was given (a gift!) a major difficulty, whatever it was, to curb the problem. But he begged to be relieved of it—exhibiting the me-focus still! Ring any bells? The Lord’s answer to Paul is so right, and Paul’s reaction to it is so right. I don’t respond nearly so well.
Oh, and here I am, making it about me again.
Just a little later in that third journey, Paul writes, “For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.” (Romans 12:3) Paul knew the problem from the inside. It was grace given to him (that gift again!) to understand. And understanding it, to be able to coach others. Others like me.
We are supposed to take the message of the scripture personally. In one sense it is about me, because God cares about me as an individual, Jesus gave himself for each individual. Remember: he shared his bread and his cup with each one of his disciples. It’s not wrong to take personally the gospel message, the salvation from sin, the hope of eternal life. As long as we remember, as Paul was reminded, that our weaknesses, our troubles, are given to us, to take away the me-focus, so that the power of Christ may rest upon us.
Love, Paul