Parenting children, helping them grow their faith

Brother David Andrews begins by talking about his family history: I grew up in a beautiful little village in Guyana.  It was multiracial.  About half black, lots of Indians and the rest indigenous. There were no Caucasians. In our environment, racism was almost nonexistent and we all grew up in school and played together, people worked together and we were quite unfamiliar with black and white racism. 

I'm accustomed to getting along in an environment that is very racially tolerant. The only time I ever had interaction of racism and a relatively mild extent was when I was studying in England.  In London, I remember a couple of cases. I would go on the bus, and a white person coming in would prefer to stand and hold on to the rails before sitting next to anyone who is black. I took it in stride because I understood that, people grew up that way, they were taught that way in their societies, and they don't know any better. It’s not for me to show any bitterness or retaliate.  I'm only there temporarily anyhow, and I never allowed it to get to me in a personal way.

Brother Dale Andrews on his family’s move to Canada: There were challenges moving between cultures. We were just trying to keep focused on the priority for us, which is our calling in Christ. At times there were incidents that I found a bit sour, even within the brotherhood. But even though there may have been, one or two incidents that are not good, there were still overwhelmingly lots of brethren who were, very helpful and loving. From that standpoint, I always tried to focus on the goal of maintaining my faith, maintaining a loving outlook and recognizing that our community is much more than any isolated incidents that might happen.

Having been brought up in Guyana where racism was not a problem for us, these new challenges allowed us to develop a very deep appreciation for the truth, irrespective of the feelings of anyone around us. Our children are living in a society where they have not had the benefit of growing in a place like Ghana, so for them there, they have been the overwhelming minority from day one.  So the little subtle or unintentional things that might happen to them in a place like Canada are more likely to have an impact on them than if they had, grown to know and appreciate the truth in a place like Guyana where they would not have felt any different from anyone else. 

We did not talk to our children about race for many years. Now that they're teenagers, we've started going to gatherings and had a few interactions that could have gone better, so we talked to them about the reason why we’re there. It's not about any individual or any perceived slight that may happen.

We want our children to develop their relationship with God and his son first and foremost. That's the most important thing to keep focused on, but make them aware of the potential disappointments that they may face in and out of the brotherhood. You have to be direct and tell them they will face disappointments. You have to be consistent in helping them keep their eye on the prize. Living the truth in these times is a life and death situation. This teaching is very serious. 

The emphasis for us as adults is to watch our behavior and what we pass down to our children. That happens in the home. You have a wonderful platform when the family meets to eat together.  It’s an opportunity to ask the children questions in a casual and even playful way without them feeling like they're being investigated.   The dinner table is a good platform to be proactive with children, find out how they’re doing, what are their own conscious views and outlook on the world, and take the opportunity to impress upon them what God expects of us and what we expect of them.

To listen to the full interview with Dale, Davi and Ian please check out A Little Faith podcasts.