A Dream from God and My Mother
May 12, 2008
Dear Friends,
A few months ago I put out a survey concerning dreams from God. My first question was “Do you feel that God still communicates with men via dreams today?” My own answer to the survey was at the time “I don’t know.” At that point, I had never had a dream which I felt was from God.
My mother has been sick for the last 24 years. She is truly one of the toughest and courageous people I have ever met in my life. Two weeks ago she went into the hospital for yet another stay.
On Thursday evening a week ago, I had a dream that my mother came into my bedroom. She didn’t say anything but just stood there. I got out of my bed and hugged her. It was vivid and real beyond anything I have experienced in my life. I could feel the bones of her backbone as I hugged her. I simply said to her “I don’t want you to go” and with that was wide awake. I knew instantly that I needed to go see my mother because she was going to die. At 3AM in the morning I dressed and drove to the hospital. When I arrived, she was wide awake as if waiting for me.
In order to appreciate the next portion of this account, you need to understand my mother’s medical condition. My mother has a weak heart which causes her to go in and out of heart failure. One of the many symptoms of heart failure is the inability to breathe well. My mother also has severe arthritis and other painful autoimmune disorders which cause her to be in constant pain. One of the real challenges for the physicians has been to give my mother enough pain medication to give her some relief without suppressing her already labored breathing. Consequently, my mother has alternated constantly in the last few months between a drugged-induced stupor and pain-filled anxiousness. Needless to say, this has limited the quality of our visits.
On the morning of my dream-induced visit, she was lucid and relatively pain free. I stayed with her for about 7 hours. It was the most extraordinary time I have spent with my mother in as long as I can remember. She slept part of the time with her head on my arm waking occasionally to stroke it. We chatted about lots of things. We told each other how much we loved each other. I rubbed her head – something that she used to pay me 25 cents to do when I was a kid. It was remarkable.
I can also tell you that in that darkened hospital room I cried like a baby and said goodbye to my mother. She never knew that I was crying. There was really no reason for me to be crying. I knew from the dream, though, that she was leaving me. It was time to let her go. She kept asking me why I was there, but I never told her the real reason. I just told her that I missed her which was true. I was just missing her into the future, not from the past.
My mother died a few days later on May 6. The doctors were getting ready to release her again from the hospital. She died quietly in her bed with my father by her side.
I have no doubt that this dream was from God and that by acting on it God gave me an indescribable gift for which I am most grateful. When my mother died, I had a real sense of peace from knowing that the same loving God who allowed me to say goodbye also took her life. The time was right for her to go because it was orchestrated by a loving God who does not make mistakes. Her pain and struggle were ended. God didn’t have to let me know that my mother was going to die. I am glad that He did though. He didn’t have to let me know the perfect time to visit – the last time I ever saw her completely aware and with her pain bearable.
If you, the reader, chose to write this account off as coincidence or the ranting of an unstable mind, I really do understand. I might have wondered the same thing had it not happened to me. It can be easily dismissed. People die while in hospitals. People have dreams. My mother was very sick. All I can tell you is that the dream was unlike anything I had experienced before to the point that I knew I had to act. There was never a moment’s hesitation.
It does strike me as odd that we are so quick to chalk up experiences like this to coincidence, chance or excitableness. The only unforgiveable sin recorded in Scripture – the so-called blasphemy of the Holy Spirit — is attributing something that was from God to something other than God. You would think that we would be highly cautious against this type of sin.
Here is what I take away from this experience. God and Jesus are alive. They are active and working among us. They love us and care for us in every detail in our lives. They are in control. From these facts, I find a peace in life. It has allowed me to say goodbye to someone whom I have loved deeply without any regrets. It has allowed me to thank Him in prayer for taking her. It has enabled me to be strong for my father as he grieves the loss of his wife and companion of the last 53 years. We do worship a powerful, loving, merciful heavenly Father and a compassionate, living Messiah. All praise, honor and glory to Him and to His son!
Have a great week,
Comments»
Bro. Kyle, What a touching tribute to your mother. I’m glad God blessed you with a chance to say goodbye and get a little closure on such a sad event.
Love, Jessica
Dear Bro. Kyle,
Your courage is something that I have always marvelled at and I thank you for sharing this. To be able to say good-bye to someone you love is a great blessing, one that we appreciate more as we get older.
Staying at your home for visits during our teenage years was a blessing in many ways and your reflections made me remember what a blessing it was to see the strong and caring connection that you and your mom had with each other, a connection that God worked powerfully to strengthen, especially at the end of her life.
Your Brother by Grace,
Shawn