Bestowing Honor on the Woman – Part 3
April 24, 2005
Dear Friends:
This week, we want to address the women. Last week we took the men to task for looking lustfully on you and treating you as objects. This week I want to ask you what are you doing to help your brothers be sexually pure in sight, thought and deed? Are you part of the problem or part of the solution?
It is not your fault that you are beautiful and desired by men. Men have to be responsible for their actions regardless of what you wear or how you behave. However, what are you thinking when dress yourself? Are you thinking about how to accent your cleavage or legs or are you thinking about how your dress honors Christ? Are you saying “look at me as a sister in Christ” or “look at me as a sex object?” If you can’t decide how to answer that, answer this question: If right now I was called to the Judgment Seat of Christ, is this what I would want to be wearing?
If many women knew what went on in men’s minds, first of all they would be grossed out. Second, they would, if they had a shred of decency in them, change their presentation of themselves. Granted, it is not easy anymore for a woman to find modest clothing. Low-cut, high-cut, tight and see-through clothing abounds, but modest clothing is hard to find. Our sisters shouldn’t use this as an excuse however. It is too important of an issue to minimize it by pleading lack of selection.
Suppose you had a friend that was a recovering alcoholic. Would you constantly offer this friend alcoholic drinks? Certainly no Godly person would do such a horrible thing to a friend. Yet many men are afflicted with impure sexual thoughts and, despite this fact, some of our sisters in Christ continue to dress provocatively. This should not be. The Apostle Paul counsels, “women should adorn themselves MODESTLY and sensibly [with discretion - Darby's] in seemly apparel, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly attire but by good deeds, as befits women who profess religion.” (1 Tim. 2:9-10 RSV) Peter writes “Let not yours be the outward adorning with braiding of hair, decoration of gold, and wearing of fine clothing, but let it be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable jewel of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.” (1 Peter 3:3-4 RSV)
It is probably very tempting for some sisters to dismiss all of this. I can hear a few saying to themselves “How I dress is none of their business. The men need to get their minds out of the gutter.” Yet, I plead with you to consider what Paul tells the Romans. “It is best to abstain from eating any meat, or drinking any wine, or from any other activity which might cause a brother to fall away, or to be scandalised, or to weaken.” (Rom. 14:21 NJB) The “I’m not my brother’s keeper” defense didn’t work for Cain and it won’t work for you either. We are all responsible for each other. We are all called upon to help each other out. We are all called upon to lay our lives down for each other. And yes, our sisters in Christ have an obligation to help their brothers be more spiritual and sexually pure in mind and deed. They can help by being careful to dress modestly.
I want to be clear that I am not blaming the women. Men are ultimately responsible for their own eyes and hearts. However, in our society where the overt objectification of females is commonplace, we sure could use some assistance. Please help us honor you.
Have a great week!
